Introduction

We, as human beings, are a product of habits, both positive and negative. Everyone, whether we like it or not, has hundreds of patterns that are activated daily that range from taking a shower to watching a particular television show, to getting ready to work.

Every day we consciously and unconsciously we are performing habits, and whatever you call them, whether it be your routines, rituals, or behaviors, habits are a part of all of us.

Habits can be divided into three different areas. First, are those habits that we don't notice anymore because they are deeply embedded in our daily lives. These habits include brushing our teeth or tying our shoelaces.

The second kind of patterns is those that are healthy for us and that we tend to try and build upon — these kinds of habits, including eating a healthy diet, getting enough sleep, and exercising regularly. The third kind of habit involves those habits that are seen as unfavorable, like overspending, smoking, and procrastination.
Every January 1st, a majority of people are filled with enthusiasm for changing their lives. They hope and desire to start the new year off fresh and setting goals that will change our lives. However, within a few weeks, we find ourselves battling the same bad habits from the previous year.

The worst part about this is that we revert back to our bad habits unknowingly and unwillingly. Over time, the ritual of setting New Year resolutions and quickly breaking those resolutions ends up disappointing use to the extent that we give up with the idea of changing our bad habits and instead choose to opt out of the yearly ritual.

Eventually, we end up with a negative connotation about change. We are made to believe that change is meant only for a few who have a lot of will power or a unique self-drive.

Unfortunately, this revelation leaves most people with questions that often go unanswered. If you find yourself in this place with lingering questions, then you can find answers here. Not only can

you rest assured that you will be able to take control of your habits after reading this book, but you will also learn the necessary steps for overcoming the bad habits that are holding you back. You will gain the knowledge and tools that are needed to break the bad habits and replace them with good ones.

Since a habit is something that you acquire as a result of the influences in your life, being able to change it will require some skills. Like any other skill, it needs both effective techniques and practice to be successful. You need to equip yourself with these skills so that you can be competent enough when facing your habit. If you want to change your habits, then you have to work on developing your skills continually.

This is because your habit becomes automatic when it is practiced with consistent, repetitive patterns that are created in your mind. The only way you will be able to defeat your bad habits is by standing up and equipping yourself for the tasks.

Chapter 1 – What Are Habits?

In order for you to understand how to break your bad habits, it is essential that you first understand precisely what habits are. According to the dictionary, a habit is a recurrent and often unconscious pattern of behavior, which is usually acquired through regular repetition.

To understand this concept, you need to know how your brain works. Your mind is created by and connected with a complex array of neurons. These neurons are fed with input from our sensory nerves and organs, which are then delivered to the brain.

These neurons are interconnected with others throughout the body and form one of the most significant frameworks of interconnected elements of the body. The brain registers, as well as maintains pathways of various neurons through the chemical impulses that it receives from the neurons. To increase cognitive ability, the brain has to keep a simple, streamlined process. This process includes setting the most used pathways as connections, which allows them to run automatically.

For example, you might find yourself in a room and can't remember what brought you there. The same applies to driving and walking. But what about bad habits?
There isn't a specific definition of bad habits. This is because a habit isn't bad or good on its own. What matters is what you do with the habit. Consider whether your habit has a positive or negative impact on your life and the life of those around you. Asking yourself this question can help guide you in defining your habits.
A positive habit will bring you success in all areas in your life, while a bad habit is one that can ruin the success you experience in life.

A bad habit can be considered as anything that takes up your time and prevents you from achieving your immediate or long-term goals, without providing you anything in return. For example, you might have the habit of playing video games during your free time.

This could be a good or bad habit, depending on how you do it. If you usually play video games with your family, it could mean achieving your goal of spending more time with your family, making it a positive habit. However, continually playing video games by yourself every day contributes to nothing, making it a bad habit. When determining whether your habits are good or bad, you have to be honest with yourself.

Take the time to weight your habits and see if they are beneficial to you. If something hinders you from achieving your goals, define it as a bad habit, and start devising a plan to break the habit.

Sample Content Preview

Introduction

Over the last decade, the idea of emotional intelligence, or EQ, has become more popular throughout the world. Unfortunately, not many people understand what EQ the term is really about or why it has become so popular over the last several years. Many scientific studies have been conducted over the years and have discovered that emotional intelligence is more important in life than the average intelligence that is measured by the IQ scale. These studies, which have been conducted by both American and European universities, have proven that the common intelligence responses account for less than 20 percent of our achievements and successes in life, while the other 80 percent depends solely on our emotional intelligence.

Everyone, from students to CEOs, is confronted by not only their own emotions but the emotions of everyone around them. How you manage these emotions has a significant impact on how other people perceive us, as well as our effectiveness to get things done. When you can increase your emotional intelligence, you can become better equipped to respond to stressful situations around you with a high degree of maturity. John Mayer, Peter Salovey, and Konstantin Vasily Peterides are renowned researchers that discovered people who have high emotional intelligence tend to become better leaders and are excellent in everything they set out to accomplish.

The first person to use the term emotional intelligence was Wayne Payne in his doctoral thesis, A Study of Emotion: Developing Emotional Intelligence. In his thesis, he compared the IQ and emotional intelligence and determined that EQ was superior because it covers a wide range of faculties and aspects of a person’s behavior. Studying your emotional intelligence will help you to understand the source and impact of your emotions better. This is important because it helps to enhance one’s self-awareness. Studying your EQ will also provide you with the opportunity to understand better the behavior of others and the underlying reasons why they act the way they do.

Emotionally intelligent people can harmoniously reconcile what their mind and reason tell them with the voice of their feelings and emotions. Thanks to this skill, emotionally smart people are self-confident, self-aware, creative, and energetic. They are also much more capable of handling stress and knowing how to get along with others. They are more optimistically approaching their life and don’t fear change. They are the people of success.

Chapter 1 - What is Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence, or EQ, refers to one’s ability to identify, understand, use, and manage emotions in a positive manner in order to enhance communication, overcome challenges, relieve stress, empathize with others and defuse conflict. The scope of emotional intelligence is extensive and covers a variety of aspects in our daily lives, like how we behave and interact with others.

When you are emotionally intelligent, you are better able to recognize your own emotional state as well as the emotional state of others. Having a clear understanding of the emotional states of those around you can help you to better relate with them, achieve greater success, form healthier relationships, and lead a more satisfying life overall.

Compared to what we know as intelligence quotient or IQ, emotional intelligence is considered more important in attaining success and happiness in both your career and your life. Your ability to read and interpret other people’s signals and respond to those signals appropriately will ultimately determine how far you will go in both your personal and professional pursuits of success. This is why it is essential that you develop a high emotional intelligence that will help you understand, negotiate, and empathize with others.

Categories of Emotional Intelligence

Researchers in the area of emotional intelligence has determined that there are five major classes of skills that are associated with emotional intelligence.

Self-Awareness

Self-awareness is your ability to recognize your emotions and the impact that they have on not only your thoughts but your behavior as well. Through self-awareness, you will start to understand your strengths and weaknesses and is a critical part of your emotional intelligence. Having self-awareness will also help you to build your self-confidence.

Self-Regulation

Self-regulation is your ability to put impulsive behaviors and feelings under control and is another critical part of emotional intelligence. While self-management doesn’t prevent you from feeling emotions, it enables you to have a say in how long a feeling lasts. Learning how to manage emotions in a healthy manner, adapting to changing circumstances, and following through on commitments are just some of the critical aspects of self-regulation.